As I did with Hallmark Channel’s Countdown to Christmas Movies, it’s time to get my judge on and thoroughly scrutinize the offerings coming this season on Hallmark Movies & Mysteries.
This year there are 17 movies slated for Hallmark Movies and Mysteries’ Miracles of Christmas but only 11 have made my Super Offical Watch List. I’ve divided them into three groups:
ALL CAPS SHOUTING IS REQUIRED – for those that are in my Top Tier, Can’t-Miss.
HI. YES, PLEASE – are for the movies that sound rad and I Will Do My Best to Watch Them.
Uh, I Have Questions – for those offerings that really need to provide more information.
In case you aren’t already a fan of these movies and you are like, WUT, you can find a full line-up on the Hallmark Movies & Mysteries Website.
ALL CAPS SHOUTING IS REQUIRED.
This is my Top Tier, aka I saw these and had an immediate, audible reaction.
Deliver by Christmas – October 25th
Summary: Bakery owner Molly (August) meets Josh (Bailey), a widower who recently moved to town with his young son, but she is also charmed by a mysterious client whom she’s never met in person and doesn’t realize that they’re the same man.
I love everything about this. Secret identities, holiday baking, and of course, the casting. JUST LOOK AT THESE TWO!
I don’t care that it’s early in the line-up, I will love this one.
The Christmas Ring – November 7th
Summary: A reporter (Contractor) searches for the love story behind an antique engagement ring. With the help of the ring’s owner’s grandson (Alpay), they learn the legacy his grandparents left behind.
1. It has David Alpay.
2. It’s about an antique ring with a hidden love story behind it.
3. IT HAS DAVID ALPAY.
A Glenbrooke Christmas – December 12th
Summary: As Christmas nears, heiress Jessica Morgan (Reeser) seizes what seems like her last chance to experience a relaxed Christmas and heads off to the small town of Glenbrooke, where she meets a handsome fireman (Cupo).
Look, this plot sounds ridiculous but this reunion is all I care about. I LOVE THESE TWO TOGETHER.
HI. YES, PLEASE.
I may not have loudly yelled when I read these descriptions, but these are still HIGH on my list to try Super Hard to Actually Watch.
Holly & Ivy – November 1st
Summary: When Melody’s (Parrish) neighbor, Nina (Nichols), learns that her illness has returned, Melody promises to keep Nina’s kids, Holly and Ivy, together. To adopt the children, she must renovate her new fixer-upper, which she does with the help of contractor Adam (Jordan).
Illness, adoption, and home renovations all leading to love? AT CHRISTMASTIME??
Y’all, I’m already crying.
The Christmas Doctor- November 15th
Summary: A week before Christmas, Dr. Alicia Wright (Peete) is offered an assignment away from home. A mysterious man (Holmes) from her past journeys to find her before Christmas and brings with him a revelation that could change Alicia’s life forever.
Is Adrian Holmes’ revelation going to be how he’s WEARING this shirt, cause I AM READY.
A Godwink Christmas: First Love, Second Chances- November 22nd
Summary: After 15 years, Pat (Page) moves home from Hawaii with his two sons and through a series of coincidences, or Godwinks, ends up stuck in traffic next to his high school sweetheart, Margie (D’Orsay), at Christmas.
Confession: I did not watch last year’s Godwink movie, but I am digging this pairing, so I’m going to give this series one more chance.
Christmas Homecoming – December 13th
Summary: When a mysterious key and a holiday riddle arrive on their doorsteps, Kate (Cole) and Kevin (Lund) embark on a Christmas romance adventure they’ll never forget.
This has a High Chance of Christmas Scavenger Hunt Montages, so, I AM IN.
Also, WHY have we never had this pairing before?!
Uh, I Have Questions
And finally, we come to the last group– the “WHAT IS HAPPENING??” group.
Meet Me at Christmas – November 14th
Summary: When Joan’s (Bell) son’s wedding planner unexpectedly quits, she must coordinate his Christmas Eve wedding with the help of Beau (Deklin), the bride’s uncle. As they work alongside each other they discover their fates and pasts are intertwined.
Wait. The groom’s mom and the bride’s uncle end up together??
What channel is this?
What am I about to watch?
USS Christmas – December 6th
Summary: Maddie (Lilley), a reporter for a Norfolk newspaper, embarks on a Tiger Cruise during Christmastime where she meets a handsome naval officer (Donovan) and stumbles upon a mystery in the ship’s archive room.
PLEASE TELL ME THIS WILL BE A HALLMARK VERSION OF NATIONAL TREASURE. ON A BOAT. AT CHRISTMASTIME.
Time for Us to Come Home for Christmas – December 5th
Summary: Five guests are mysteriously invited to an inn to celebrate Christmas. With the help of the owner Ben (Huszar), Sarah (Chabert) discovers that an event from the past may connect them and change their lives forever.
A. They really need to shorten these titles.
B. Five strangers invited mysteriously to an inn? Is this And Then There Were None?? Who’s about to die?
Swept Up by Christmas – December 19th
Summary: An antique seller and a cleaner clash over how to downsize a magnificent estate right before Christmas. As the two uncover the house’s treasures, they find a way to reconnect the reclusive owner with his own Christmases past.
This is a movie about cleaning. No, wait, a CHRISTMAS movie about cleaning.
Lol, wut.
Which Miracles of Christmas movies are you looking forward to this year?
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